2 Timothy 3 King James Version (KJV)
3 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.
2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,
4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;
5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
6 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,
7 Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
That passage describes the narcissist and his victims perfectly. Those who read the entire Bible will have the wisdom to protect themselves from such people. Those who have half of a Biblical education will be devoured and battered by such people. The last part of the passage describes exactly what happened to me. I became a frequent narcissist delicacy because I didn’t read the entire Bible. I was a weakling who didn’t really know how to develop, and once the narcs got to me, they surely didn’t try to encourage my spiritual development, lol. Additionally, I didn’t repent frequently. Therefore, I was a silly girl/woman who was “laden with sins” and too immature and ignorant to realize that evil was coming in for the kill. I only had part of the Christian ideals right. I truly did care for everyone, but I cared for the wrong people at the expense of my own spiritual health. I cared for them to the point of disobedience. I was the epitome of a Biblical silly woman.
All I ever wanted was love. I never desired their physical expressions of lust, and I certainly didn’t desire physical, verbal or emotional abuse. I just wanted to get back the same love that I was cranking out. I wanted real love. Unfortunately, I got caught up in a seemingly never-ending cycle of trying to squeeze milk from a rock. The narcissist does not return love for love. He just takes whatever you give him, and many times, he will beat you down worse because you are such a loving person. The truth is that he hates you if you are compassionate in any way. He doesn’t want to be with you; he wants to hurt you. This is what many women fail to understand.
The narcissist wants nothing more than to see you to die. He will laugh at your pain, leave you at your deathbed, desert you for an immoral person and then try to come back (heh?), etc. If you are a believer, then he will find delight in leading you straight to hell. I’m being real. Narcissists are nothing to play with. God is the only entity that can “fix a narcissist.” All you can do is pray for such a one, and stay as far away from it as possible. The No Contact Rule practice can help you with that. As a Christian, you have to forgive the narcissist to stay spiritually balanced, but you don’t have to touch it or absorb any of its darkness.
Jesus has all the love you need. He will accept you despite your imperfections, and He will never abandon you. If you are having difficulties with a narcissist, you must seek help from the Lord. I know it’s rough being married to one as I was married to one before. You will find strength and healing in Christ, but you can’t be shy about asking Him for it. Your sins are forgiven.
My next post will describe several narcissistic types that I have come across in my lifetime. It may help you to recognize some of them. I had the displeasure of dealing with a veteran female narc and several male narcs. Hopefully, my post will help you to avoid going through what I went through.
In closing, I will say to read your Bible and pray every day. Lack of knowledge is a real Spirit quencher.